Attracting Conservative Men

Are you a woman who embraces progressive values but also finds traditional displays of chivalry intriguing? You're not alone. TikTok is full of women, who want men with the kind of values they understand as pro-social and masculine, but lament that this can primarily be found only in conservative men.

A 2018 study from Iowa State backs this up, reporting that progressive women prefer men who demonstrate more traditional dating behaviors.

Now, why some of the TikTok ladies lament the fact that traditional values tend to only be found in conservative men…confuses. It seems pretty intuitive: if you want displays of chivalry, and traditional dating behaviors, you will gravitate towards people who believe those traditions need to be, dare I say….conserved ?! And I won't ruin the punchline, but they have a name for people who want to conserve traditional values, dating behaviors, and ways of being from what modernity is doing to them...

In addition to those with traditional dating preferences, as more men move to the right the need for understanding, and tolerance, on the part of all young women (progressive preferences included) is going to become more and more important if those women want a packed dating calendar. Study after study shows that while conservative men can, and will, tolerate progressive women- the reverse is not true.

One day, we can foresee some hard choices: Stay a single cat mom, or adjust your window of acceptable thought to include moderate and conservative ideas, in your dating partners.

All of that aside, for now, let’s delve into ten effective methods to captivate conservative men and enhance your prospects of finding a partner who demonstrates dating behaviors you synch with.

Let's immerse ourselves in uncovering the ways to harmonize your progressive ideals with traditional dating norms.

1. Embrace Your Feminine Side

Conservative men really appreciate femininity and adore women who embrace it. You can show off your feminine side by dressing in an elegant and classy way, choosing soft and gentle colors, and enhancing your natural beauty. You can also express your femininity through your body language, gestures, and overall demeanor. Remember, being feminine doesn't mean giving up your independence or strength; it's all about celebrating your unique qualities as a woman.

In his book, “The Art of Seduction”, Robert Greene talks about the seductive character, and choosing your archetype. He ties them to history's greatest seducers and the effect they had on the targets of their interest. One of the most powerful archetypes is “The Siren”, and one of the first stories is about Cleopatra. A woman who, is misunderstood in that there were many around her more beautiful than she- looks was not necessarily her draw. What set her apart was that, “her dress and makeup changed day to day, but always gave her a heightened, goddess-like appearance. Her voice....was lilting and intoxicating. Her words....were spoken so sweetly that listeners would find themselves remembering not what she said, but how she said it.”

Cleopatra understood the power of femininity on those around her and did everything she could to lean into that understanding and her own femininity.

2. Cultivate Traditional Values

You don't have to adopt all conservative values, but taking the time to understand and appreciate them can be beneficial in building meaningful connections. Conservative men often prioritize values such as family, faith, and personal responsibility in their relationships. By exploring these values and finding common ground that aligns with your own beliefs, you can establish a deeper and more profound connection with the men you’re attracted to.

Outside of engaging in open conversations, and information-seeking conversations, with your more conservative/moderate interests of desire, it may be wise to get some background by reading some of the thinkers that may be influencing your potential dating partner. Some places to start:

"Democracy in America" by Alexis de Tocqueville

"The Road to Serfdom" by Friedrich von Hayek

"The Conservative Mind: From Burke to Eliot" by Russell Kirk

"Free To Choose: A Personal Statement" by Milton and Rose Friedman

"Righteous Indignation: Excuse Me While I Save The World!" by Andrew Breitbart

Podcasts by Tucker Carlson, Michael Knowles, Dan Bongino, and Dana Loesch may also clue you in to why he thinks the way he does. If you need to hold a barf bag while you listen, we’ll all understand.

Not only will you gain some perspective on why your man thinks as he does, but it may help you bolster your own thinking, and create better arguments for your own progressive ideals.

3. Showcase Your Intelligence and Ambition

Conservative men admire intelligent and ambitious women who have goals and aspirations. Demonstrate your knowledge and showcase your achievements in a humble and confident manner. Engage in intellectual conversations and share your opinions on various topics. Conservative men appreciate a partner who can hold her own in discussions and contribute meaningfully to their relationship.

4. Be Supportive and Respectful

Conservative men value respect and appreciate partners who are supportive of their aspirations and beliefs. Show genuine interest in their endeavors and provide encouragement when needed. Be open to understanding their perspectives, even if you may not always agree. A respectful and supportive attitude will foster trust and create a strong foundation for a long-lasting relationship.

In his video on attracting any man you want, Orion Taraban, Psy.D, at Psych Hack states that there is one unbreakable rule in getting any man you want:

Never disrespect the man you want, or want to keep.

Why? Because within male culture, respect is a prerequisite for continued relationships. It's not only valuable to men individually, it permeates through any institution that was/is male-created/dominated: sports, the military, police, etc.

Certainly, respect is not an unknown among women, but the fact is that for men it is the barrier to entry and the main (and maybe only) currency by which men exchange conversation, ideas, friendships, etc.

5. Take an Interest in His Hobbies and Interests

One effective way to attract a conservative man is by showing genuine interest in his hobbies and interests. Engage in activities that he enjoys, whether it's attending sporting events, exploring the outdoors, or engaging in intellectual pursuits. This shared experience will deepen your connection and create opportunities for meaningful conversations and bonding.

6. Appreciate Traditional Gestures

Conservative men, due to their adherence to traditional values and behaviors, often uphold certain expectations when it comes to dating. This may include acts such as graciously opening doors for their date, taking the initiative to pick up the check, or offering their jacket as a gesture of warmth and protection during chilly weather. It's important to not only notice but also genuinely appreciate and acknowledge these gestures when they occur. Doing so reinforces their sense of being valued while also affirming their role as providers and protectors in the relationship.

Why is this important? Men's self-worth is often dictated by his purpose, his code of ethics, and his leadership ability. Taking any of that away from him, for any reason, will diminish him within himself. Very few men will stay in situations where this is seen as acceptable, by their partner. Over a long enough timeline this will not be tolerated and must be remedied as soon as possible to have a tranquil and loving relatoinship.

If you want a conservative man in your life because you value some of those traditional aspects of character, use your power to constantly build those attributes up, not tear them down. If you can manage that, you will have a man for life....

7. Communicate Your Desires

While it's essential to appreciate traditional gestures, it's equally important to communicate your desires and expectations openly. Let your conservative partner know what makes you feel loved and appreciated. Effective communication will ensure that both of you are on the same page and can create a harmonious relationship that blends tradition with modern values.

8. Engage in Thoughtful Conversations

Conservative men appreciate partners who can engage in thoughtful conversations and share their insights. Stay informed about current events, political topics, and social issues. This knowledge will enable you to participate in meaningful discussions and connect with your conservative partner on a deeper level. Remember to approach conversations with an open mind and respect differing opinions.

9. Show Respect for Traditional Gender Roles

While progressive women believe in breaking gender stereotypes, it's important to respect traditional gender roles when dating conservative men. Understand that they may have different expectations regarding family dynamics, homemaking, and child-rearing. Discuss these topics openly and find a balance that respects both partners' values and desires.

10. Be Authentic and True to Yourself

Above all, be true to yourself. Attracting a conservative man doesn't mean you have to change your core values or compromise your identity. Embrace your progressive beliefs while appreciating the traditional aspects that resonate with you. The right partner will appreciate and love you for who you are, so don't be afraid to let your authentic self shine.

Remember, finding the perfect partner is not about conforming to a specific mold or compromising your values. It's about finding someone who appreciates and respects you for who you are. By embracing your femininity, sharing common values, and engaging in thoughtful conversations, you can attract a conservative man who will cherish you and create a fulfilling and harmonious relationship.

Need help navigating the dating minefield?

If you're interested in discovering your natural dating archetype or need help improving your seduction game and dating life, feel free to book a coaching session with me, Phillip, at Open Heart Academy Coaching.